WE ARE WHO WE ARE: Running is the perfect metaphor for mental health

By Lisa Sugarman

Back in the winter of 2018, in the early years of writing my original column It Is What It Is, when I was running lots of marathons and up to my eyeballs raising my daughters, I wrote a piece titled, “Here’s why running is the perfect metaphor for parenting.” And you know what, it really was. At the time, I drew so many beautiful parallels between raising kids and running. You know, like how we give our kids all the skills and tools to run their own “race of life,” but how, in the end, we can’t run it for them. How we can only get them to the start line and the rest is up to them. Stuff like that. These days, though, as we all try to navigate a world where it feels like everyone is struggling with something, I’m thinking about that old column in a very new way…

Six years later, in today’s world, where, according to the National Institutes of Health, 57.8 million adults live with some form of mental illness, that column has popped back into my mind. A lot. But not from the perspective of a mom raising kids. This time, given the global rise of things like mental unwellness, suicide and depression, I’ve been thinking about it in different terms. And I’ve been compelled to re-write what I wrote so many years ago from a new point of view. Because the more time I spend as a mental health advocate and a crisis counselor, watching so many people grappling with their mental health, the more I notice that there are also some big-league similarities between the sport of running and mental health. Comparisons that I think might be helpful in terms of better understanding why some days are good days, and some just aren’t. Because sometimes, we just need to look at things from a different perspective to help us gain clarity.

So, here’s how I see the overlap between running and mental health…

Much like how we build up our physical endurance when we train to run, we also condition our mental health as we age and mature. Over time, we learn what we need as humans to function at our best and we try to do those things. Not to oversimplify, but that’s the essence of how we develop. We learn that we need to get copious amounts of sleep to support our brain function, so we try to sleep more. We discover which foods work best for our bodies, so we do our best to eat those foods. We learn (hopefully) how to create and maintain boundaries, so we attempt to preserve them to ensure healthy relationships. We figure out how to course correct and keep moving forward after we have setbacks or disappointments.

And let’s not forget that with both running and our mental health, even though we can find support within the community around us, we still have to do the actual work ourselves. Like how it’s motivating to run with a run club or a friend, they can’t log the miles for us. We still have to run our own run. And mental health works the same way. We can find strength in support groups or through therapy, but we’ve got to do that internal work on our own.

Some days, like some runs, are just crap.

There are days when we’ll be hijacked by our feels or crushed by a grief attack, or we’ll feel insecure or unmotivated for no identifiable reason. And those are the days when we have to slow our mental pace and give ourselves a little extra grace when we’re having a bad day.

In the same way that running is a continuous process that requires a consistent investment of our time and energy to develop strength and stamina, our mental health demands a similar commitment to self-care and consistency if we’re going to keep strengthening it throughout our lives. But here’s the caveat… sometimes, even despite our best efforts to prepare for every run or race by doing all the right things, we can still have amazingly bad runs. And our mental health works the same way. We can check off every one of our daily wellness practices like journaling and fitnessing and meditating and resting and we can create and maintain healthy boundaries to keep our relationships positive and we can practice all the right kinds of self-care and still wind up in a chaotic headspace. That’s because mental health, like running and like life in general, can be unpredictable. Even when we’re sure we’ve checked all the boxes to ensure that things go smoothly, we can still have shockingly bad moments that fall completely beyond our control.

Which brings me to the resiliency piece.

Some days, like some runs, are just crap. There are days when we’ll be hijacked by our feels or crushed by a grief attack, or we’ll feel insecure or unmotivated for no identifiable reason. And those are the days when we have to slow our mental pace and give ourselves a little extra grace when we’re having a bad day. Just like when the wheels fall off during a run and we need to adjust by slowing down or taking a walk break or just stopping altogether. Because sometimes the day or the run is just hard. But that doesn’t mean we stop running entirely, we just adjust in that moment and adapt to the circumstances. Then we have another go at it another day. Just like when we’re having a bad mental health moment.

So just to recap, here are 5 ways that running is like mental health:

1.      Endurance: Just like how running requires physical endurance to keep going despite fatigue or obstacles, mental health demands its own brand of emotional and psychological endurance to cope with life’s challenges and setbacks.

2.      Pacing: In both running and mental health, pace is crucial. Pushing too hard can lead to burnout or injury, while not pushing enough can impede our progress.

3.      Progress that’s not linear: Both running and mental health journeys are never straightforward. There are challenges, plateaus, and setbacks. And understanding that progress isn’t always linear is key.

4.      Self-care: Just as runners prioritize rest, hydration, and proper nutrition to support their physical health, we need to prioritize self-care activities like mindfulness, therapy, and healthy relationships to maintain mental well-being.

5.      Community support: Running communities provide encouragement, motivation, and a sense of belonging. Similarly, having a supportive network of friends, family, or mental health professionals can make a big difference in our ability to navigate and overcome mental health challenges.

See, running and mental health are practically twins.

Lisa Sugarman is an author, a nationally syndicated columnist, a three-time survivor of suicide loss, a mental health advocate and a crisis counselor with The Trevor Project. She’s also a storyteller with the National Alliance on Mental Illness and the host of The Suicide Survivor Series on YouTube. Lisa is also a Survivor of Suicide Loss Grief Group facilitator for Samaritans and she’s the author of “How To Raise Perfectly Imperfect Kids And Be Ok With It,” “Untying Parent Anxiety” and “LIFE: It Is What It Is.” Her work has appeared on Healthline Parenthood, GrownAndFlown, TODAY Parents, Thrive Global, The Washington Post, LittleThings and More Content Now. Lisa lives and writes just north of Boston. Visit her online at lisasugarman.com.